Dear 2018...

Dear 2018...

I can honestly say, I'm not sorry to see you go. Our journey together has been filled with extremes, confusion and growth. There have been super high highs and dangerous lows accompanied by depression and lack of focus along with manic behavior and lethargy. On the other hand, there has also been positive progress, both emotionally and physically.

As I say good-bye to 2018, I also say good-bye to cancer and the fear and sadness that has been eating me up for far too long. While I have spent the past 9 months cancer-free, letting go isn't automatic. I have slowly but surely figured things out, figured out how to work through some of the emotional baggage that comes with the territory. (There is nothing like a good Psychologist to provide the right tools to an over-thinker.)

I experienced an epiphany in 2018 that I felt in my soul, one that began the “letting go.” I figured out the real meaning of “new normal” and there started my understanding and slow progression toward acceptance. I'm getting there but, damn, what a jagged pill! Truth be told, 2018 has been pretty good to me, all its ups and downs have fueled my drive for 2019 and beyond.

On January 1st, 2019, I began a Happiness Jar. On the 2nd, I made a “to-do” list that involves change and a great deal of it...a large helping of letting go with a side of begin again. On the 3rd, I peeled shrimp. (No big deal? Do it with one hand.) And so on and so forth. I look forward to what may come in 2019 as I put my brain tumor and cancer further into my past and change my focus to living, laughing and loving.

See ya, 2018. What you got happening, '19?