Facing Our Own Mortality (for Kevin)
Scary title, huh? Frightening. As we get older, it’s normal for thoughts of our own mortality to cross our minds. The natural order of things brings them on but then something out of the ordinary smacks you right in the face and you’re forced to look death square in the eye. For some of us it’s only a really serious scare. For others, it means saying good-bye.
I sat on the edge of my bed, tears rolling down my cheeks. I was facing brain surgery for a tumor laying on the nerve center for my left side. It would be “life changing” surgery, followed by treatment for the cancer. I bowed my head and told God I couldn’t do this on my own. All the strength I had was shaken to the bone and, while praying to the God I had grown up with wasn’t a common practice of mine, my own spirit was tapped.
It wasn’t long after the surgery that they began coming out of the walls. I firmly believe that there were people that crossed my path for a reason…to help me understand and make it through a terrifying time in my life.
I basically grew up with Kevin. Back in the day, we shared conversation over a doobie more than once. His wife and caregiver reached out to me when I posted some journaling about my battle with cancer on Facebook. Kevin was in treatment for melanoma that had reached his brain. He and I IM’d, comparing scars and talking brain surgery, reconnecting after decades apart.
Kevin lost the fight not long ago, leaving behind many who loved him. I think of him often, knowing that, despite inevitability, his strength showed and gave me a push I needed to keep going and going. Kevin was one of the many who have impacted my life as I’ve gone through this and I can’t thank those friends enough for giving me the hope and strength to work toward becoming the new cancer-free me.
Rest in Peace, Kevin.
